Saturday, September 11, 2010

The story makes me realize that the traditional idea is still ingrained in younger generations.

A few days ago, my friend told me the story below:
Her friend has a son who is a senior in University of Tokyo, the most prestigious university in Japan. He has a girlfriend from the same university. He used to spend a lot of time doing a sport after school, and had struggled for some time to make a good team as a captain. Every time he had difficulties in his sport team, his girlfriend supported him and helped him overcome them. Thus, they have already built a good and strong relationship, and started thinking about marriage after graduation. When his parents noticed that, his father frowned on the marriage despite being sure that she is a very nice person. Can you guess why?

His father believes that he has a huge potential for the future mainly because he will be given a big title: a graduate of the University of Tokyo. As a matter of fact, this title is still effective in Japanese society, so many parents with children attending the University of Tokyo put their hopes on the children. In addition, the parents tend to want their children with the big title to marry someone who really can support their careers. Like these parents, his father wants that, but wants that in a very traditional way. In other words, his father wants him to marry a woman who is willing to stay at home and devote a large part of her life to supporting him and his family. However, his girlfriend is intelligent enough to enroll in the University of Tokyo, so his father assumes that she wants to purse her own career. At the same time, his father objectively thinks that she should do that. Because of these reasons, his father doesn't view her as eligible or the right person for the son's wife. Actually, his father's attitude toward marriage is based on a traditional idea.

With the economic downturn and social change, more husbands, especially young husbands, expect their wives to earn money. These days, if wives don't work, it will be very difficult to make ends meet. It's common for married couples to share housework and financial burdens. Workers have realized that everybody, regardless of educational background, is subjected to the risk of getting fired due to corporate restructuring. Thus, I'm surprised to see that the traditional idea is still ingrained in the father despite him being around 50 ( if he were over 70, I wouldn't be surprised).

Male graduates of prestigious universities are still likely to play important roles in our society. I have to admit that their parents still tend to take a conservative attitude toward marriage. This attitude can have a influence on the sons: the male graduates. Under these circumstances, it will take some time for our society to change to the point where women can pursue a career path without hesitation if they want.